Dear Oscar Mayer…

Oscar+Mayer+will+not+pick+up+their+phone+to+answer+a+few+questions.+

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Oscar Mayer will not pick up their phone to answer a few questions.

Dear Oscar Mayer, 

Greetings from the Day Creek Howl, one of the top middle school journalism programs in the country. We tried really hard to contact you multiple times over numerous days. We got about as far as the receptionist each time in an effort to get your statement. 

Why did we reach out to you? On Twitter, we read about the release of Ice Dog ice cream. We found your new flavors fascinating and hoped to write an article to our pre-teen/teenage audience about the unique desert. During our initial call, one of your workers said that we had dialed the wrong number within your company. The next day, we called Oscar Mayer again. This time your employee gave us a fake number. The same situation reoccurred three additional times. 

Since we did not have any quotes from you, we had to improvise. We worked to recreate the Ice Dog flavors, using candied sausage and vanilla ice cream. Next, we attempted to write an article about students at our school who sampled our recreated Oscar Mayer ice cream along with French’s mustard ice cream instead of our original plan of sharing your organization’s product and gathering our peers’ opinions.

But something was lacking. The article that we wrote was dull and it was not the initial piece we hoped to publish. On August 31st, our adviser called you and your corporation and one of your attendants promised that they would return our call within twenty-four hours. Since it was Labor Day the following week, we waited until Tuesday. Once again, Oscar Mayer dropped the ball.

Your business has been advertising your products to young people like us before we were born. The platypus in the Lunchables commercial isn’t marketed to parents. Nor is the Kool-Aid man who walks through walls. We are confused as to why you ignored the opportunity to answer a few questions about the product that you produced to appeal to young people just like us. We originally wanted to write an article that would have given you even more positive publicity. Instead, we are writing about how you couldn’t even pick up your phone.  I guess it’ll get some attention, but not the kind you probably want. 

We are still waiting for your response Oscar Mayer.